It stings when we get turned down for a dance. There’s lots of good advice out there encouraging us not to take it personally, and that it happens to everyone.

But if we find ourselves consistently turned down for dances, or notice that people are going out of their way to avoid us, then the rejection becomes more personal. Personal, but potentially enlightening.

We may be inclined to blame something else (the floor’s too slippery and I’m not dancing well tonight), someone else (he/she must be a tango snob), or everyone else (they’re all tango snobs except me). And then there’s honest self-examination, which can be a painful, but more useful strategy.

So do we just have bad tango habits… or bad personal habits?

It might take a while to discover the answer(s), but the dance floor will bring us to the question in ways that few other environments will.


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